Wednesday, June 1, 2011

I am not a success as a woman...

My theory of success is almost the same as my theory about happiness.  I think that success is not a place that we once get there we stay.   We must collect as many successful moments as we can during our lifetime.

It is the same philosophy I have with happiness.  Our lives are not perfect, so how happy we are is based on how often we have happy moments. 

This way of visualize success in life was not the view I had of it years ago.  In some point in life I thought that success was getting a profession, to form a family, have a house, and all the things our parents, teachers and the media (society) taught us.   I had all that, and yes in some way, I felt successful in life.

The dilemma came when for different causes and circumstances I lost my job.  In less than 4 years I have lost my house, cars, and other possessions and I was raising my boys by myself.   Even though I was going through moments that were challenging my survival skills, mental health and other aptitudes towards life, I felt successful too.  I then found that success is more than economic stability, a profession that give you a status or fame.  Success is finding the way or ways to strive in this challenging world.

One of those ways I found was to learn to live my now (still learning).  Every day for me is a milestone to success and happiness.  At the end of each day I reflect with some questions like:  How many happy moments I had during the day? How many successful moments?  A lot? My day was a success.  Not much? Tomorrow will be then....  

This new approach to life made me feel more relaxed about all the worries I have for things out of my control.  It is making me see things with equanimity and more efficient with the situations I really have some control and that depend of my actions to solve them.  

I am probably not a success as a woman, but I am a woman with many successful moments.

Thank you for reading!
~Vanessa

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This is my submission to the GBE 2: Blog on topic of this week: SUCCESS.

23 comments:

  1. I like your attitude about successful moments!

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  2. It sounds like you are very successful with a multitude of successful moments. Great blog!1

    Kathy
    http://www.thetruckerswife.com/

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  3. I think we all are very successful if we see it in a less broad perspective. Thanks Kathy!

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  4. You can only take things one day at a time :)

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  5. Wow. I needed this blog today! So many things are beyond my control that cause me to worry. You give great reminders. Thank you.

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  6. Well I absolutely adore that.

    "I am probably not a success as a woman, but I am a woman with many successful moments."

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  7. Surely the fact that you have many successful moments makes you a successful woman? Well it does in my eyes :)

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  8. @ Kate: It is the best way, one day at a time...

    @MrsWilk: I need it everyday, for the rest of my life.

    @Christina: Thank you very much!

    @Mojo Writin': I guess, just trying to affirm it in a less absolute way... :)

    Thank you all you guys for reading!!!

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  9. stripping away...reveals our essence..makes me think of that scripture; "in our weakness we will find strength" and those "I SURVIVED" on Sunday nights. Listen to the stories and marvel..just like i did when i read this ((hugs))

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  10. You are raising really beautiful boys--teaching them to be kind and strong and resilient. If that's not being a successful woman, I don't know what is.

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  11. @Brenda: Thank you for your kind words!

    @Beth: You are too good to me, :)

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  12. Great approach. Took me over 60 years to learn. Glad you found it much younger.

    Pam
    http://apiratelookspastsixty.blogspot.com/2011/06/success-saboteur.html

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  13. @Pam: The important thing is that we learned it...
    (((HUGS))

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  14. I agree with just about everything you've mentioned here. I think you are a super successful woman though and a wonderful person in general. Your constant craving and attempts with self improvement are extremely admirable, as well. I hope you never go a day without at least one happy moment.

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  15. @Trish: Okay, you made my day, nah my year!!! :)
    Thank you!

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  16. You sure are a success! Indeed, as you say: success is more than economic stability, a profession that gives you a status or fame. Success is finding the way or ways to strive in this challenging world. Great words.

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  17. Vanessa sounds like you are very successful. It isn't about what you have in your pocket, your driveway or in your lawn...it is about what is in your heart. Cheers, Jenn.
    http://www.wine-n-chat.com

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  18. @Langley: Thank you for your words and for stopping by...

    @Jenn: Yes is in the heart. :)

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  19. Love, love your blog! You're so right! I'm sorry for your set backs, but isn't it amazing that kids aren't concerned about that? If they have a warm meal, warm conversation, warm hugs and books shared - their world is perfect. I know in "our" world, it is more than that - but we can learn from them. Good luck to you!

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  20. @ Beach lover, thanks. You are so right, they are my teachers through all this. We need to pay attention to children. Thank you for reading!

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  21. I very much enjoyed reading your post. Nicely written, inspiring, and the line "I am probably not a success as a woman, but I am a woman with many successful moments." is just awesome! I'd argue that you sound very successful indeed.

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  22. @Laurie...

    Thank you for stopping by. I feel successful, just trying not to use like absolute expressions.

    :)

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